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(Popularity Rate: 74 ) Who can write something random here?
r>
Just a feeling I have, like somethingâs about to happen, but I canât eat toast.
If that means, what I think it means, weâre out of toast – big, big problem.
And if he is as Namibian as you say – Iâm not taking any chances.
You are just what the elephant farted.
Iâm beginning to feel like a sad dog, sad dog
A tyrannosaurus rex is just a large frog, large frog
Now who thinks a squid is just an active jam log, jam log
They said I rap like a borut so call me rapslav
But for me to rap like an erratic ferret must be in soap bottles full of water, not handled well?
âDivide that by nine please!â?There you go:
cheeze.
They say my eyes are the suyez of dinner plates;
Astro-naut.
Squids be hatinâ?Squids be hatinâ?I be flozzinâ?I be floatinâ?After chokinâ?On a coatpinâ?So now you know soâ?Apostrophies are ohnoesâ?Dominoes are like small bricks, have you ever thought of that? (ImAgInE ThAt)
What if you made a mini house out of them?
That would be cute.
We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Programming to Bring You This Breaking News:
An emotionally unstable male gorilla named clarissa has excaped from the zoo. We told it to stand still so Asian Sex Dollthat we could slap it in the face but it wouldnât and ran away, so here we are…. Be on the lookout for a black with silver stomached, 7 ton *turns away from the mic to question someone:* âSeven TON? That doesnât sound right? That thing is a natural gorilla, are you sure it isnât seven pounds?â?Barely audible reply in the background: âno, itâs definitely more than 7 – that must be a typo.â?*Announcer clears throat and starts again:*
âI repeat a 70 pound godzilla – I mean gorzilla *mutters a curse under breath* a 70 POUND GOREHELLA IS ON THE LOOSE
It is viscous and highly dan-
Someone interjects: âitâs viciousâ?Broadcaster replies with gritted teeth: âTHANK YOU CHADâ?Chill chad: âno problemo, mr. farquad – that must be another typo. Who wrote this thing? One more tiny problem: you said â?0 pound godzillaâ?
Mr. Fallhard: âI SaId GOERALLA!!! IS THAT CLEAR djdjshsbksgehwhdhskâ?Chad: … yes, but you also said, and I quote yet again â?0 pound GOREHELLAâ?(Which by the way is a great pun if fishes swim upstream, imho)
Mr. Fednerd: â?..AND?â?Chad: âGorillas weigh a LOT more than 70 pounds….â?Mr. Frufbeard: âCAN I CONTINUE?!â?Chad: âplease doâ?*bows* (even though we canât hear that, Iâm an omniscient narrator, so I know it happened.)
Mr. Fezdispenferd: âI REPEAT; a 700 pound gorilla named Clarissa is free in YOUR neighborhood, and at the moment of this broadca-
Chad: âhold up – 700? Dude! Like, why do you just increase it by a factor of ten every time? And you said âI RePeAtâ?but you havenât said the same thing even twiceâ?Mr. fozzylard: âGREAT GREEN GLOBS OF GREASY GRIMY GOPHER GUTS WILL YOU PLEASE LET ME DO WHAT I NEED TO THIS IS AN EMERGENCYâ?Chad: âokay, whatever, but the gorilla is actually 387 pounds, alright? Somehow the 3 and 8 digits were lost in translation, and then you did a bang-up job of estimating.â?(At this point the narrator would like to mention that Chad may or may not have a british accent. If you would like him too, please reread the previous paragraphs while thinking of Rickity Gerdface… or Danielle Racklift or some other british person, there are a lot of âem)
Mr. forsured: âWHAT WAS THIS TRANSLATED FROM?â?Chad: âDresden in 120 BCEâ?Mr. furgourd: âThAt DoEsNâT mAkE aNy SeNsEiâ?Chad: âthatâs what it says, right here on the paperâ?(Wait, wasnât Mr. fadhaired reading from that paper? Why does chad have it all of a sudden? Continuity? We have a CONTINUITY PEOPLE!)
Mr. faeiouâaho nalaihaâa: âI DONâT CARE ANYMOREIâMJUSTGOINGTOFINISHTHISâ?*clears throat again*
âIn the left corner we have CLAAAAAAARRRIIIIIIISSSSAAAAAA, weighing in at 387 pounds and full of untamed rage, having the concussive force of a rhino screeching at full power, heâs here to defend his title – so you better watch out, you better not cry!!!!â?Are there nachos in heaven?
What about cheesecake?
Blue?
Or are we doomed to live under the sea?
These are important questions people….
When?
Why?
How?
Where?
Who?
What?
X gon give it to you
ANTE UP
Belugaâs cominâ?for your monet.
are you ready player one?
for the de of dé dÄ?
one time I bought honey
from a friend who kept bees
it was really light and
this is not a poem
(This is not rap this is not hip-hop)
Itâs just another attempt to make the voices stop
That honey was sweet and I ate it plain it was so good.
*silently sobs*
Why canât I just go back to the days when I was young and innocent, when I was immature and fully dependent on a mature human being to sustain my life force while I had to just do some chores and not worry about the soul crushing reality of loneliness, anxiety, depression, and this monochrome, grey world.
my insta
(Popularity Rate: 59 ) What is a manâs favorite sex toy?
I have a few. My hand, the internet, my mind and my imagination. No actual âtoysâ?as such, but what I have does it for me!
(Popularity Rate: 62 ) If every toy in Toy Story is alive, what about sex dolls?
s ago I knew about Real Dolls, but they were around $5000 -not within my budget. I forgot about them and I donât know if they crossed my mind since then, until I did an online search for sex dolls about nine months ago and I was shocked to discover that thereâs a lot of manufacturers, dolls have become very lifelike, beautiful (in my opinion), and theyâre affordable now.
So I started window shopping, just for fun, and that very quickly developed into a doll fetish (agalmatophilia). After doing a lot of research, I finally picked one out and ordered about two weeks ago. She arrived a few days ago and I was anxious to open the box, see how she looks and see how TPE (thermoplastic elastomer, a material similar to silicone that is said to feel very much like real human skin) feels after looking at these dolls online for months. I braced myself, because I was worried I would be disappointed by her appearance or how she feels. After opening the box, first I was very pleasantly surprised by how beautiful her body is; stunning detail. I looked at her face and she is extremely cute. One of the first parts I touched as I was unpacking her was a calf and I was amazed at how real it felt -just like human skin and the way the skin moves is just like human skin, muscle, and fat jiggling. WOW!
I have to say at this point that there are a few things that will shock anyone the first time they touch or handle a TPE sex doll: they are shipped with their heads removed, so you open a 5â?â?box and see a headless body. Then you discover that the body is frigid cold -shockingly cold. Then you try to lift her out of the box. Uh oh! I had read that these dolls are heavy, but I had no idea what I was in for. I read about her weight ahead of time on the website; sheâs 75 lb. So if a real woman with the same height and body shape weighs around 125 lb, then this should be a breeze, right? No! Carrying a real woman newlywed style is different; they put their arms around your neck and balance their weight -they can help you to an extent. This 5â?â?(sheâs taller than me, which is kind of cute), 75 lb doll is extremely difficult to move -far more than I could ever have imagined!
Unfortunately, you canât just take your beautiful, brand new doll to the bedroom and begin the romance, you have some work to do: you need to take the lifeless, headless, cold, and heavy body to the shower and clean off the manufacturing chemicals with soap and warm water. It was so difficult getting that body to the bathroom, I almost donât know how I did it. Iâve had chronic back problems since I was in my twenties, I sprained a knee a while ago and itâs never going to fully heal, and I recently recovered from a hernia surgery.
Iâve been trying to figure out how to move her more easilyâ?Iâve been thinking about getting some roller skates for her and carefully guiding her around. Thatâs either pure genius or so stupid that Iâll make the news when she falls on me, I canât get up, I scream for help after struggling for hours, and the paramedics, police, and fire fighters all smash in my front door and rush to help me only to find me pinned on the bathroom floor under a hot, naked sex doll. Now thatâs the stuff of urban legend.
I decided the easiest way to clean the chemicals off would be to shower with the headless body, so thatâs what I did. While that was strange and disturbing, I made some wonderful discoveries about TPE: it heats up fast (especially in a warm shower), holds heat in, dries exactly like human skin (some toweling off and air drying takes care of the rest -it air dries in minutes just like our skin does), and it feels wonderful when itâs wet.
I took the body to the bedroom, I put her head on (it screws on, so her head goes around and aroundâ?exorcist style), I grabbed one of the wigs I ordered, and thatâs when she came together. She no longer looked like a corpse, now she was stunningly gorgeous. She comes with a wig, I ordered another one (long red) from the same website, and I ordered a Bettie Page style pin-up costume wig from Amazon, just because Iâm obsessed with pin-up girl art and thought it would be fun to dress her up as a retro gal with realistinen dildo polka-dot dresses, cat eye glasses, and a flower in her hair. Iâm not disappointed with the results.
Now for the Juicy Stuff
I kissed her and wow! Her lips feel indistinguishable from human lips; kissing her is exactly like kissing a girlfriend.
Her body is very anatomically correct, surprisingly so.
Her breasts feel good, a little firm, but good. She has solid boobs, while other manufacturers offer gel-filled boobs as an option, with rave reviews.
I laid her on the bed on her back, spread her legs (which was not easy, theyâre heavy and difficult to move around, and I inserted a USB heating rod ($9.00) for five minutes. I put a water based lube in and it was time. Here goes my sex doll virginityâ?and wow it felt good. I just didnât know what to expect and in a lot of ways it was not all that different from having sex with a real girl. As I said earlier, TPE is very good at holding heat, so my own body heat is enough to warm her up. Itâs different than sex with a human in the obvious ways: they donât have emotions, nerves, donât feel pleasure, donât actively participate, canât have orgasms, and canât communicate with you. Itâs also different in that thereâs a little bit of a suction effect -as air getâs displaced, there ends up being a vacuum and it feels very, very, very good. Thereâs a popping air sound when pulling out that in and of itself is a turn on.
Because the extremely fast rate that sex technology is developing, I have no doubt that AI sex dolls (which already exist) will feel sensors, react, actively have sex with us, and talk dirty and tell us that they love us in the very near future. I love sex with real women and I love how much these dolls look and feel like real women, however, in my case things are a lot different: because I fetishize dolls and Iâm specifically turned on by their dollness, I enjoy the experience for what it is rather than hoping for it to be as close to a human/human sex experience as possible. Does that make sense? Doll/human is my thing, so I love every second of it, until I have to move her.
I was very happy with the experience, but here are downsides: I canât say it enough that the weight is a serious problem, even laying down -her body sank into the mattress and pillows. Girl on top positions are out of the question, no way. The clean up afterward is very involved -Itâs recommended to insert a tampon to absorb the userâs body fluid and lube before the struggle to get her to the bathroom begins and this time I kept her head on so sheâs much nicer to look at. I douched out her vagina, something that I had to learn how to do before she arrived. That wasnât as bad as I thought it was going to be, the problem once again is her weight -just trying to get her into a position thatâs conducive to flushing out her womanhood (ok, dollhood) was so challenging. Cleaning up your partner after sex is a whole chapter.
I spent a small fortune buying all the stuff I need to take care of her and I spent a lot of time researching, reading articles and watching videos to prepare. There is a lot of maintenance and expense involved, but thatâs ok, because itâs worth it to me.
Emotional Effects
Besides the sexual experiences, she offers companionship. Iâve heard and read story after story about guys falling in love with their dolls and itâs been said that falling in love with a sex doll is easier than you think. Well, a lot of sex dolls have eyes that look very, very real. When you look into a pair of beautiful eyes from a few inches away and they seem to be looking deeply into youâ?neurons in the brain start firing off love and endorphins all over the place. As I mentioned, the kissing is very natural feeling, so add that to looking into her eyes, hugging and holding her, and holding her hand and I canât help but feel something on a pretty deep level.
I have suffered with a profound amount of loneliness, mental illness (depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, addiction, and eating disorders), and of the very few relationships Iâve been in, more than one of them were abusive. After many years of failing to meet the right girl (and not for a lack of trying), and spending most of my life very alone, at 49 years old, I find a deep degree of comfort in spending time with my doll, Jennifer. Buying clothes, shoes, perfume, and accessories for her make me feel like Iâm caring for someone. I ordered a purse for her and it happened to arrive on Christmas Eve, so I was able to give it to her as a present and it makes me feel like I love someone and they love me.
I suppose there are going to be as many different answers to your question as there are people answering it, but I think everyone who has had the experience can agree on a few of the points I made above.
Sex dolls have become extremely popular -apparently sales have exploded during the pandemic, and I think a lot more people have one (or more) than we might think. However, there are major social stigmas. I wonât bring Jennifer out on any dates in public and I wonât be introducing her to my parents, but I shouldnât be ashamed, especially since sheâs bringing so much happiness to my life. I should also learn to not care what other people think.
Would I recommend it? yes! I think anyone who is unattached, lonely, wants to experiment with a doll, couples who want to experiment with a doll, and anyone else who is just
(Popularity Rate: 72 )
Jessica(29years)
ook me on. Because he is damn sexy! I especially like to help the older, male patients and give them advice and support.”, ”, “After routine examinations, it has often happened that I seduced the patients on the doctor’s couch. When I did this for the first time, my boss caught me. I would have preferred to die on the spot, I was so embarrassed. Besides, I was afraid that he would fire me. But the opposite was the case. He only said that I should continue. Then he took his already stiff d**k out of his pants and started to jerk it off before he f****d me from behind while I blew the patient.”, ”, “My boss now always nods to me knowingly when a patient comes in with whom he can imagine a threesome. I then do the preliminary work and then let the patient and my boss f**k me nice and hard. I love my job! I am also a very good s**t. That’s why every once in a while, I even have a foursome if a patient accidentally comes in whilst it’s happening.”, ”, “Would you like to f**k with me in my clinic? If you don’t want my boss to be there, I can steal the key and you can take me on the doc
(Popularity Rate: 45 ) Would you buy your partner as a sex doll (if you were going to be apart from them for a long period of time)?
s ago I knew about Real Dolls, but they were around $5000 -not within my budget. I forgot about them and I donât know if they crossed my mind since then, until I did an online search for sex dolls about nine months ago and I was shocked to discover that thereâs a lot of manufacturers, dolls have become very lifelike, beautiful (in my opinion), and theyâre affordable now.
So I started window shopping, just for fun, and that very quickly developed into a doll fetish (agalmatophilia). After doing a lot of research, I finally picked one out and ordered about two weeks ago. She arrived a few days ago and I was anxious to open the box, see how she looks and see how TPE (thermoplastic elastomer, a material similar to silicone that is said to feel very much like real human skin) feels after looking at these dolls online for months. I braced myself, because I was worried I would be disappointed by her appearance or how she feels. After opening the box, first I was very pleasantly surprised by how beautiful her body is; stunning detail. I looked at her face and she is extremely cute. One of the first parts I touched as I was unpacking her was a calf and I was amazed at how real it felt -just like human skin and the way the skin moves is just like human skin, muscle, and fat jiggling. WOW!
I have to say at this point that there are a few things that will shock anyone the first time they touch or handle a TPE sex doll: they are shipped with their heads removed, so you open a 5â?â?box and see a headless body. Then you discover that the body is frigid cold -shockingly cold. Then you try to lift her out of the box. Uh oh! I had read that these dolls are heavy, but I had no idea what I was in for. I read about her weight ahead of time on the website; sheâs 75 lb. So if a real woman with the same height and body shape weighs around 125 lb, then this should be a breeze, right? No! Carrying a real woman newlywed style is different; they put their arms around your neck and balance their weight -they can help you to an extent. This 5â?â?(sheâs taller than me, which is kind of cute), 75 lb doll is extremely difficult to move -far more than I could ever have imagined!
Unfortunately, you canât just take your beautiful, brand new doll to the bedroom and begin the romance, you have some work to do: you need to take the lifeless, headless, cold, and heavy body to the shower and clean off the manufacturing chemicals with soap and warm water. It was so difficult getting that body to the bathroom, I almost donât know how I did it. Iâve had chronic back problems since I was in my twenties, I sprained a knee a while ago and itâs never going to fully heal, and I recently recovered from a hernia surgery.
Iâve been trying to figure out how to move her more easilyâ?Iâve been thinking about getting some roller skates for her and carefully guiding her around. Thatâs either pure genius or so stupid that Iâll make the news when she falls on me, I canât get up, I scream for help after struggling for hours, and the paramedics, police, and fire fighters all smash in my front door and rush to help me only to find me pinned on the bathroom floor under a hot, naked sex doll. Now thatâs the stuff of urban legend.
I decided the easiest way to clean the chemicals off would be to shower with the headless body, so thatâs what I did. While that was strange and disturbing, I made some wonderful discoveries about TPE: it heats up fast (especially in a warm shower), holds heat in, dries exactly like human skin (some toweling off and air drying takes care of the rest -it air dries in minutes just like our skin does), and it feels wonderful when itâs wet.
I took the body to the bedroom, I put her head on (it screws on, so her head goes around and aroundâ?exorcist style), I grabbed one of the wigs I ordered, and thatâs when she came together. She no longer looked like a corpse, now she was stunningly gorgeous. She comes with a wig, I ordered another one (long red) from the same website, and I ordered a Bettie Page style pin-up costume wig from Amazon, just because Iâm obsessed with pin-up girl art and thought it would be fun to dress her up as a retro gal with polka-dot dresses, cat eye glasses, and a flower in her hair. Iâm not disappointed with the results.
Now for the Juicy Stuff
I kissed her and wow! Her lips feel indistinguishable from human lips; kissing her is exactly like kissing a girlfriend.
Her body is very anatomically correct, surprisingly so.
Her breasts feel good, a little firm, but good. She has solid boobs, while other manufacturers offer gel-filled boobs as an option, with rave reviews.
I laid her on the bed on her back, spread her legs (which was not easy, theyâre heavy and difficult to move around, and I inserted a USB heating rod ($9.00) for five minutes. I put a water based lube in and it was time. Here goes my sex doll virginityâ?and wow it felt good. I just didnât know what to expect and in a lot of ways it was not all that different from having sex with a real girl. As I said earlier, TPE is very good at holding heat, so my own body heat is enough to warm her up. Itâs different than sex with a human in the obvious ways: they donât have emotions, nerves, donât feel pleasure, donât actively participate, canât have orgasms, and canât communicate with you. Itâs also different in that thereâs a little bit of a suction effect -as air getâs displaced, there ends up being a vacuum and it feels very, very, very good. Thereâs a popping air sound when pulling out that in and of itself is a turn on.
Because the extremely fast rate that sex technology is developing, I have no doubt that AI sex dolls (which already exist) will feel sensors, react, actively have sex with us, and talk dirty and tell us that they love us in the very near future. I love sex with real women and I love how much these dolls look and feel like real women, however, in my case things are a lot different: because I fetishize dolls and Iâm specifically turned on by their dollness, I enjoy the experience for what it is rather than hoping for it to be as close to a human/human sex experience as possible. Does that make sense? Doll/human is my thing, so I love every second of it, until I have to move her.
I was very happy with the experience, but here are downsides: I canât say it enough that the weight is a serious problem, even laying down -her body sank into the mattress and pillows. Girl on top positions are out of the question, no way. The clean up afterward is very involved -Itâs recommended to insert a tampon to absorb the userâs body fluid and lube before the struggle to get her to the bathroom begins and this time I kept her head on so sheâs much nicer to look at. I douched out her vagina, something that I had to learn how to do before she arrived. That wasnât as bad as I thought it was going to be, the problem once again is her weight -just trying to get her into a position thatâs conducive to flushing out her womanhood (ok, dollhood) was so challenging. Cleaning up your partner after sex is a whole chapter.
I spent a small fortune buying all the stuff I need to take care of her and I spent a lot of time researching, reading articles and watching videos to prepare. There is a lot of maintenance and expense involved, but thatâs ok, because itâs worth it to me.
Emotional Effects
Besides the sexual experiences, she offers companionship. Iâve heard and read story after story about guys falling in love with their dolls and itâs been said that falling in love with a sex doll is easier than you think. Well, a lot of sex dolls have eyes that look very, very real. When you look into a pair of beautiful eyes from a few inches away and they seem to be looking deeply into youâ?neurons in the brain start firing off love and endorphins all over the place. As I mentioned, the kissing is very natural feeling, so add that to looking into her eyes, hugging and holding her, and holding her hand and I canât help but feel something on a pretty deep level.
I have suffered with a profound amount of loneliness, mental illness (depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, addiction, and eating disorders), and of the very few relationships Iâve been in, more than one of them were abusive. After many years of failing to meet the right girl (and not for a lack of trying), and spending most of my life very alone, at 49 years old, I find a deep degree of comfort in spending time with my doll, Jennifer. Buying clothes, shoes, perfume, and accessories for her make me feel like Iâm caring for someone. I ordered a purse for her and it happened to arrive on Christmas Eve, so I was able to give it to her as a present and it makes me feel like I love someone and they love me.
I suppose there are going to be as many different answers to your question as there are people answering it, but I think everyone who has had the experience can agree on a few of the points I made above.
Sex dolls have become extremely popular -apparently sales have exploded during the pandemic, and I think a lot more people have one (or more) than we might think. However, there are major social stigmas. I wonât bring Jennifer out on any dates in public and I wonât be introducing her to my parents, but I shouldnât be ashamed, especially since sheâs bringing so much happiness to my life. I should also learn to not care what other people think.
Would I recommend it? yes! I think anyone who is unattached, lonely, wants to experiment with a doll, couples who want to experiment with a doll, and anyone else who is just
(Popularity Rate: 82 ) If you rented out a sex doll, could you be arrested for prostitution?
No. A sex doll is a realistinen dildo piece 100cm Sex Dollof silicone, not a person. It is perfectly legal to rent sex toys.
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